911

After September 11, 2001 it felt as if there was no way to comprehend what we had experienced. My mind ran a variety of thoughts from the shock of facing such an uncivilized act occurring in a so-called civilized city, to the thought that it is amazing that it had not happened sooner. I feebly tried to wrap myself around this act of violence in conversations with others trying to understand my relationship to the destruction. The proximity of my studio to ground zero was close enough that I experienced the haze and smells of smoke and soot continually arising from the funeral pyres of mass carnage. This was an unnerving and new experience for me as well as a constant reminder of my vulnerability and mortality. As horrific as this act of violence was it seemed inevitable. Feeling my vulnerability was unsettling and initially slowed my productivity down. I had to face my feelings first. Yet there was an odd sense of comfort in living in New York City and experiencing this tragedy firsthand. It was blunt and real. This profound reality awakened a deep respect for life and it's frailty. There was nothing vague or in between about the reality. It brought me in contact with my center; balance and spirit as well as hitting me square like a Zen master's stick. It shocked and surprised me into the present moment, alive with more of an awareness of what that really means. It is said in the worst of circumstances that we encounter, the sweetest gifts can be found. In essence it was a clear view of